5: Human Design and Reclaiming Your Authentic Self (w/ Kris Prochaska)

My great honor today is our guest is Kris Prochaska in Bend, Oregon. And Kris, thank you for being here today. Thank you, Mara. It’s so good to see you and always awesome to be with you. Yes, yes.

I’m excited for our conversation today. Well, I’m excited about this. You have been on my list of the top people I’ve been wanting to have on the podcast for quite a while now. So I’m glad that this is happening today. And so I want to start with really what you do and what sets you apart from other therapists.

And I can speak volumes of my positive experiences, but I want people to understand where you’re coming from, what your vision is with every individual with this one-on-one therapeutic coaching that you offer, and why both a soul and Human Design, these relational, um, energetics that you play with. Yeah. Yeah. Well, first of all, so I’m licensed in Oregon and Washington, so straight-up therapy here. And I also work in a ketamine-assisted psychotherapy clinic.

So I do a little bit of that, do psychedelic integration, and then I have a private practice. And going 20 years now, I’ve been coaching and coaching entrepreneurs and also individuals.

And yeah, so basically, really what I do is, especially anybody who’s outside of Oregon and Washington, I do more therapeutic coaching. So it’s really therapeutically informed. And I think what sets me apart is because there’s a lot of people out there who are doing Human Design and other different symbolic systems, Enneagram, astrology, etc., etc., um, but I do have that therapeutic background. And so even though it I may not be doing straight-up therapy with folks who live outside of these 2 states just because of my license. It is therapeutically informed, and I am always tracking when I’m looking at someone’s Human Design chart or in their Soul Design or whatever we’re doing is how do I do that ethically?

How do I do that within my scope of practice? How do I really Yeah, just stay in that place of understanding this more holistic perspective of it’s not just that someone’s coming to me and I’m like gonna help them figure out their business. I’m also taking into consideration any relational trauma they, they have experienced. What, what’s their nervous system doing? And, and then also looking at it through the lens of design and being able to take that clinical background And into the coaching perspective.

So I do think that that’s probably the big thing that sets me apart. Plus there’s all kinds of fun art and creativity and, you know, psychic work. Yeah, I have a couple of questions about the metacognitive art and things that I want to go into with you that also sets you apart as a unique practitioner. But I want to stick with maybe just define, I think a lot of people don’t know what we’re talking about. What is Human Design?

What is soul design, what is the energetic attachment style? These are the 3 parts that you work with. So what are these 3 things? Yeah, yeah. Okay, so first I’ll start, I’ll mention soul design really quickly just because it’s not something that I teach, it’s something that I’ve learned.

It’s reading the Akashic Records and going in. And I know how to do a ton of different kinds of readings in the Akashic Records, But there’s one specifically that I really like to hone in on, and that is our soul design. And that is really the energetics of what our soul came, how it is designed at soul, how we’re designed at soul level, the energies that we carry. So there’s like 8 different sort of energies that we carry. You could think of it like a pie.

And then there’s 1 or 2 that we are, we carry, we carry all of it, but there’s one or two that is, um, probably the most, the strongest expression in our soul makeup. Our soul design does not change lifetime to lifetime. Our human design does. So let’s look at human design now. I think of our human design as the vehicle that our soul is expressing through.

And so, Every single time I look at someone’s Soul Design and their Human Design, it is like the perfect match of, of course you’re experiencing this, and of course in this human, you know, vehicle. Spiritual beings having a human experience, right? Yes, yes, exactly. And so our Human Design, if astrology, the chakra system, the I Ching, the Kabbalah, quantum physics and human genetics had a baby, and that’s what Human Design would be. It’s really the synthesis of all of those things.

So it’s energetic, it’s genetic, it is, you know, it’s the soul’s journey, right? The Kabbalah and the I Ching both map that. And what’s interesting is in the I Ching, there’s 64 hexagrams, and those 64 hexagrams overlay match with the 64 codons in the human genetic code. And so we really are looking at how are we designed, what is this vehicle, how is it designed to interface with reality in this third, you know, 3-dimensional world that we live in. We’re always- our designs are always talking to each other.

So it’s really a language and a map of our energy, how we process things mentally, how we process them emotionally, physically, energetically. And when we can look at that, we can start to understand how we get activated by people, right? Triggered. And how our design is being activated by the transits, by each other, and really what our purpose is and how we best communicate that. So the two together, we have our soul design, it’s here in this vehicle.

How is this vehicle meant to really move around on this planet, right? And play nice with others. That’s the hard part, right? In the playground together. Um, I, I love that you mentioned the I Ching because of course this taps into my traditional Chinese medicine roots and the idea that we have prenatal chi.

This is this divine energy that was given to us that creates those 64 hexagrams, a 64 DNA code, right? This is the beautiful DNA we inherited from each of our parents. But that soul energy manifests in our eyes in Chinese medicine. That energy is called the Shen, S-H-E-N, in Chinese medicine, and it resides in our heart. When we wake in the morning, it leaves the heart, it comes to our eyes, and that’s how we’re up.

And that’s why when I look at you, when I look you in the eyes, I am seeing your soul, and I want to move closer to you. I want to get to know you more. I want to have more conversation, or I want to back away and I don’t want to look you in the eye. Or if it’s on me that I’m kind of like head down, I’m going through something in my own personal life that I’m not making eye contact, I’m not making Shen connection, that’s a dormant, hidden, damaged, traumatized Shen in the moment, right? And so that’s- and then at night, our Shen goes back into our heart to sleep at night.

But if we’re not sleeping, like we have anxiety or mind racing, that’s our Shen not rested. It’s our soul not feeling safe and grounded and secure. And so I love that these layers all come together and reinforce the validity of them, right? Totally, totally. And It is so true.

And I think that that whole piece about the eyes, I mean, we know, right? The eyes are the window of the soul, but it’s like what you are saying there when I’m working with different folks. Uh, you, yeah, there’s, there’s something in the eyes and, oh, I remember the first time I had coffee date with you. We were at Mother’s Cafe in Bend, Oregon. Yeah.

And you have crystal green eyes, right? And I have the light blue eyes and I remember looking at you going, We are gonna see through each other, right? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, totally. And I will never forget that. It’s not often, A, you remember the first time I’ve met someone, much less a very clear detail of like exciting, exhilarating stimulation and intimidation.

Oh my God, that’s my Scorpio. That’s Scorpio. That’s all the Scorpio. That’s double Scorpio. And so that’s like You and I, from my own experience, are a perfect example of the Shens connecting.

And I want to circle back to this because there’s a part of my human design that is open, that is completely empty, where yours is completely full in this exact section. And I remember you had explained to me, and I want you to kind of share that later on, but I don’t want to forget that that’s another reason we are attracted to one another is because we’re balancing. I’m gonna let you use the words, providing something that was- I don’t want to use the word missing because there’s nothing missing. It’s- what is the word you would use in this? That- yeah, what I would say is we’re, we’re activating.

Activating. Yes, activation. I’m seeking this in you because you have something I don’t have, and I feel better when I’m around you. Yes, because of this energy that you possess that I don’t. And it’s not a good or a bad thing.

It just is. It just is. So we’ll circle back to that. But that’s that idea of, like, our shens are connected, our eyes lock, but then the gates are lighting up and where we need to be more fulfilled, maybe. Right?

Yeah. Or just that it’s- so if we all have everything, right, we all have all of it. We all contain all the 64 codons and the genetic code. We contain all of those things. It’s just how are they being expressed.

So we do carry all of the 64 hexagrams of the I Ching, but that, but some of them are more quote unquote dormant. They’re not, um, if we look at it, nature versus nurture, and we’ll pull up a chart here in just a minute for, for folks so you can kind of see it. Um, I remember the very first time that I saw the chart, I was like, uh, this looks like Chinese. I literally thought that. I was like, it looks like Chinese to me.

And, but something about it, it was like a deep recognition in my soul. And this is the, the, I mean, I’ve studied tons of different kinds of things. I mean, for continuing education and all of that, but because I love to study and, um, I just, I just dove in and this is probably the longest thing that I have studied. I’ve been studying it and teaching it since 2012 and It is something that continually brings more like, oh wow. And so that we have this nature versus nurture, the things that are colored in in our design that are always turned on, if you will.

And then the areas that are white, that are, they’re receptor sites. We’re waiting to be activated by somebody else. So nature versus nurture, right? So, And the other thing I do wanna say is that there’s times where we’re around people and the healthy expression, it’s not just that we’re missing, it’s also what we’re looking for, what we’re seeking is to be activated by someone who has a healthy expression of that energy there. Because we’re being activated all the time, right?

We are, we’re always around each other and we’re being activated by the transits, et cetera. But What’s, what are, I like this idea. You just used the word about like, we use that term. It’s like, wow, they light me up. Yeah.

They light you up. They light. And I like that you just said that. That’s a great way to define that. It lights me.

They light me up. They light me up and it feels good. And I feel that activation. Now here’s what’s interesting. Let’s now let’s bring it into attachment.

So we’ll weave this part in is that when, gosh, there’s so many layers to this. I’ll be accurate. Okay. Um, But, you know, someone asked me about a year and a half ago, do you work with attachment? And I was like, yeah.

I mean, I do, but it’s funny because it, of course I studied it in grad school, but it’s not something that I was like, oh, I’m going to specialize in attachment. Right. It’s just something that’s like, it’s now really more in the last couple of years that people are like attachment, attachment. What’s your attachment style? There are 4 attachment styles.

Right. Yes. We have avoidant, anxious, uh, sort of mixed and secure. Like that’s the sort of disorganized is the mix, but I hate disorganized. Okay.

So like, I think there’s actually a beautiful organization in it, but anyway, I digress. So we have this, our attachment styles are, um, so they, they asked me, do you do this work? And I was like, yeah. And just instinctually, I was like, yeah. And then.

I realized that what I had been doing working with people in their designs is that I had just been tracking how we’re energetically connecting and, and talking to each other through our designs. And when we’re with certain people, we may feel a little more anxious. When we’re with other people, maybe a little bit more avoidant or the mixed sort of like back and forth. Right? Some other people, we might feel a little more secure.

So what I started mapping was, wait a minute, this is also an energetic thing. So I started looking at attachment purely through an energetic lens. Yes, through some trauma and relational trauma and all the different developmental things that go into our attachment style. But I started looking at it through the lens of design. And seeing that some of us, depending on our design, may be a little more naturally avoidant or a little more naturally anxious because of the design.

But that we could, if we start to work with and learn how to be in a healthier state, whether something’s colored in or white, that nature versus nurture, that we can start to develop that inner security and sovereignty that is all based in our energetic, in our body. We can start to find that and understand why we’re attracted to some people. They may light us up, but they may not be lighting us up for the reason that is a healthy reason. Right. It might be like, oh, that’s familiar.

Right. Ooh, that energy’s familiar. I know how to manage that energy. That makes me feel alive because that’s what I grew up with. Right?

That makes me feel right. It’s familiar. It’s familiar, right? So when I’m looking at design charts or I’m looking at couples or parents and the kids or whatever, I’m also looking at how is your, how is your design just sort of naturally going to move. There’s going to be lots of different layers to that.

We’re not just fixed. I think that’s the big thing to understand is that we’re not just like this this is who you are and there’s no changing it. It’s really like, this is your whole beautiful energetic map and the way we navigate in the world and with others, and that it gets activated by others and we activate other people too. And yes, there are patterns that move consistently through, But we can also work with those. And I think that’s the place where all of those converge for me.

It’s this deeper knowing, right, of self. Everything you’re talking about brings us back to the day-to-day, how we’re exposed to different environments and different people, and that there’s an inner knowing of how we need to kind of ebb and flow with that. Well, do you want to show one of these charts or a couple of these charts so people have a idea of what these are and what we’re talking about of red and white and not filled in and filled in. Yes. Yeah, yeah, let’s do that.

Okay, so let me share my screen. And while you are pulling that up, I’ll, I’ll share that my business partner and I both did our Human Design charts with you. I had done mine with you, gosh, I think 15 years ago. And then, like you said, this is my DNA. This is who I am.

This doesn’t change, but I have to come back to teachings with you when, like you said, the ebbing and flowing through life that I’m like, okay, something’s not in alignment right now, or I’m confused of how to navigate this particular phase. Kris, talk me through my Human Design chart of how I can best go about it with grace versus strife and struggle and feeling insecure or unhappy about it, right? Whatever all the things are. Acts as a guide for me that I’m on a path. And so when I asked my business partner to do this with me, I said, we literally cannot move forward in what we’re doing if we’re not understanding each other’s energies and where we come from so that we’re not banging our head against the wall with each other.

And we did this together, and I thought it was probably one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever heard somebody say is you asked me, you said, what is your greatest takeaway from this experience? And he said, how to protect each other’s energies. Yeah. Because that’s all we have, right? We just, we are just, like we said, spiritual beings having a human experience and we drain that energy.

I mean, as you know, I went through a complete, like, face down in the mud this last end of winter, spring because of not conserving and protecting my own energy. And I’ve had to rebuild it back up, but I’ve done it through your support and guidance to tap back into this exact thing and learning again, how do we protect our energy? How do we do that? Yes. Yes.

And how do we protect each other’s energy and honor each other that we’re going to process things differently? Right. So can you see my screen? This is your chart right here. Okay.

Yeah. And then I- what’s that? I said great. Yeah. Okay, great.

And then we also have Steve, your business partner’s chart here too. So, um, And you’ll see, right? Look at this, how different they are. Very different colors, different lines filled in, emptied. Yep.

So this is the- these are the quote-unquote traditional colors of, uh, of these centers, and, um, they, they don’t necessarily mean anything. Uh, nobody actually knows. Everybody’s like, what? Why is this one yellow and this one green? And these are brown.

It’s- that’s unclear. However, they, um, these are the centers. So just kind of going through. So the chakra system kind of relates to that. Also, if you were to flip this upside down, it does look a little bit like the Tree of Life in the Kabbalah.

When you think about the different, um, you know, the, the, uh, shapes there and then the lines that connect them, that the soul, the the, uh, journey of the soul that the Kabbalah, uh, tracks, you could- these are just similar to these channels that are here connecting these different centers. And these centers are also the chakra system, so they do relate to the different chakras and different energy areas of the body. What’s different about, you know, typically we think of the 7 chakras. Here we have 9. 9 centers.

And so the 2 that are different from our typical, you know, chakra system is the G center, which is our center of self, our center of identity and direction in life, and the spleen center, which is the center of our immune system. And I know in Chinese medicine, the spleen is a huge- it’s a big part. Our spleen qi, as we call it, the vital life force of the spleen organ or the energy of the spleen is- well, from a Western medical perspective and Chinese medical perspective, it’s digestion, right? It is one of the cornerstones. It is the earth element in Chinese medicine coupled with the stomach.

So as we take in food, it then gets converted into this splenic energy. It’s a big part of our container of blood. It’s very important for women with the regulation of their menstrual cycles. Um, and where we are flowing through the differentiations of our ages of the cycles. And then when we are really draining our energy, our spleen qi is going to become deficient.

And our digestion is- this is where people are like, I bloat, or I feel really tired after I eat. I eat food and I need to go lay down and take a nap because the spleen is just like, I don’t have any energy to give. I’m tired, man. I’m tired and I can’t convert this food. So I need you to go lay down.

Take a nap so I can focus on converting them to make the fuel. So splenic energy is very much digestive system, but this, and what is food? Food is fuel. So it’s exactly what we’re talking about, that if that fuel is depreciated, our energy is going to be depreciated. Women’s menstrual cycles are going to become irregular also.

Yeah, totally. Totally. Yeah. So when we’re looking at these centers, we’re seeing the things that you like, you have your spleen defined. Defined means it’s colored in.

Turned on 24/7, right? If this was like a motherboard in a computer, everything that is colored in, it doesn’t really matter what color it is right now, is turned on all the time. You’re transmitting energy here. Now, this is, remember what I said, we wanna be around people who have, who are transmitting healthy energy. And what does that mean?

It just means that somebody is, you know, honoring the energy here, honoring, in your case, your splenic energy and your, um, this is, this is actually your authority in Human Design. This is where you make your decisions from your spleen, which is a split-second, very subtle knowing, very subtle energy. So, and it happens in the moment. It says it once. It doesn’t say it again.

It doesn’t come back. You can’t go back and go, hey spleen, what did you say? It’s like, you know, the hackles go up. It’s gut knowledge, right? Yeah, kind of.

And I’m going to only for the- just because in Human Design, we do have the sacral, which is the gut, and you don’t have that colored in. I do. That’s the one that I was saying that I don’t have and you have. Yeah. So I’m a generator type and I have this one colored in.

So you and Steve do not. And that’s because you’re a manifester type and he is a projector type. And projectors, manifestors, and reflectors do not have the sacral center colored in. Those of us who are generator types do. I’ll show you my chart real quick.

This is my chart. And so we all, if you have that red square right there, you’re a generator or manifesting generator right off the bat. Here’s what’s interesting. We make up generators and manifesting generators. I’m just going to call us generators.

Uh, 70, about 70% of the population. And so you’re, you’re, you know, in, in many ways, these different, um, types, they’re not personality types. What they are, energetic types, right? So we generators literally generate the energy for the planet. I’m so envious of you.

I’m so envious. You don’t need naps. I need naps. Yeah, you need naps. You need naps because, yeah, what’s wild.

So we make up 70, we’re generating this energy, right? You’re a manifester. You’re here to really instigate things, initiate things, to get things started, right? And I say you have more of a sprinter type energy. You come in, you’re like, I have an idea.

You make it happen, people. Really in your highest expression, you’re out there delegating. Now you do have a lot of willpower and you do have a lot of energy. And so you can do a lot of things. That doesn’t mean you should.

And I think that’s, we’ve talked about that. That’s what led to my burnout in the early spring was I was holding multiple Human Design chart roles rather than focusing on my one role that way. And like you said, just because you can doesn’t mean you should, right? Exactly. Exactly.

So then if we look at Steve’s, he’s a projector. Projectors are here to, uh, guide, uh, other types. Um, but they have to wait to be in for an invitation. Yes. Right.

So they have literally says that he literally uses that phrase. He said, I was waiting for the invite. He literally says that phrase and I’m like, oh my gosh, that’s literally your human design. Yeah. So I love that you just said that because this is what I, I say, this is like my, you know, I think people reflect this back to me over and over again.

They’re like, I just keep thinking about what you said. I said, our design does us, not the other way around. So we don’t learn about our human design so we can be like, ooh, I’m going to do my design. I’m going to do it perfect. We learn about it.

So we go, oh, that’s how my freaking vehicle drives. We learn, you know, and over time, you know, and, and, you know, we’re all, we, we’ve, we’ve been around for a couple decades, so we know, right? Like, that works for me. That doesn’t work. And Steve, he’s like, yeah, it doesn’t work if I just come in there and try to guide people and tell people what to do.

If I don’t have, if I’m not in that position of, of, um, you know, direction, or I haven’t been invited, it will backfire like every time, right? You as a manifester don’t need that permission. You’re here, but you have to inform people. You just need to let people know, hey, I’m moving in this direction. You can either come or not.

Just get the hell out of my way, essentially. Either you’re going to help me or you’re not, you know? And so it’s very different. And as a generator type, and I’ll pop mine up, generator, ours is to respond. And that sounds very, very, um, you know, simple, but not always very clear.

What, what is it that we’re responding to? We’re responding to energy. Remember, this is energy we’re talking about. So even though you’re here to like initiate things and kick things off and start things, There’s, um, the way you do that is going to look very different than a different, than another manifestor. Right.

So a lot of sense too, because like, if you think of Steve as a projector archetype, he’s a project manager. He is a contractor. He is a developer. He creates projects on massive scales and he has the incredible ability to put people in the right positions. But he does let them lead.

Yes. He doesn’t tell them how to do it or what to do because he’s, like you said, waiting for the invitation. He’s engendering them and empowering them on his project scale. Right. And I love that you, you gave the example of you and I that you’re like, it’s like we’re getting to an island and I’m in my powerboat with 4 engines and I’m already on the island and you’re behind me as a generator.

You’re rowing the boat. You’re like, I’ve got it. I’m like, why are you not on the island already? And you’re like, because I’ve got all the energy in the world to row my boat. And once I get there, I’m still going to have energy.

One of the women who I did the water fast with in April, she is an MD, a mom of 4, just started her own private practice business. And, and, and, and it Guess what? She’s a generator. And I sat there going, how has this woman done all of this incredible accomplishments and is such a beautiful human on top of it and not burned out? And I’m like, oh, she’s a generator.

Yeah. We can get burned out though. Well, for sure. I mean, for sure. I mean, obviously we are not of infinite capacity, no energy sources of infinite capability, but it’s that idea that she could sustain for a longer period of time through massive levels of stress and tasks that I cannot, right?

I need the nap. She does not need the nap idea. Yes. And so I just love that this starts to explain versus me feeling insecure around her of why can’t I do as much as her? Or if she’s like, why am I not getting it done as fast as her?

It’s not a good or a bad thing. And that’s why we all come together to help each other. Yes, complete things, right? It’s like, this is what my greatest thing about it is, is it’s not to feel insecure of what I’m not capable of. It’s like, thank goodness I have Kris in my corner who can pick up where I don’t have that resource, literally.

And thank goodness we have Steve in the other corner that he can pick up what you and I don’t have in our corners, right? I just, I think it’s a beautiful way to see how we can all engender each other. Exactly. Exactly. So we’re, all of our energies are always talking to each other and we’re going to do things differently.

There’s so many layers to this. We were just talking about different types. There’s, there’s different profiles. There’s different, are you emotional? You know, Steve is an emotionally defined person.

You and I are not, right? This is yours. You don’t have the solar plexus, neither do I. Um, they’re what we have them, but it’s not, it’s not turned on all the time. We don’t process things. We’re not designed to process things through our emotions, right?

And so in yours, yours is completely open. And so there may be times where people who are feeling things very deeply and they’re like, God, you’re so cold, Mara. How come you don’t care about this? Like, I am deep in my pain and you’re like, I can feel your pain. I am empathic.

I can empathically feel it. But, you know, like there’s a way through this, right? Like you can tend, we, those of us who have it white, we can be a little more objective naturally, right? Now that doesn’t mean we don’t have our own emotions and it doesn’t mean we don’t get completely sidetracked by emotions. But more often than not, whatever emotions that we’re getting sidetracked by, unless something really like is happening in our world, like to us, uh, we can be pretty emotionally neutral when our- when we have this white.

And somebody who, like Steve, has it colored in- now Steve’s a little bit different because he’s not a super like up and down emotional person, right? Yeah, yeah, he’s very even-keeled. Yeah, yeah, he’s very even-keeled, but that’s also part of, you know, his wisdom that he’s earned, you know, through the years. And also just, he does feel things. He feels it very deeply.

It doesn’t always get expressed. See, it’s not connected up to his throat. So he’s feeling things deeply, but he’s also not gonna necessarily move from his emotions either. And so, but we can pick up on those emotions even if he’s not saying them. I’m just using Steve as an example.

It could be anybody, right? I think that’s what makes you and me innate healers because we can listen to our beloved clients, but we don’t take it on. We don’t interject ourselves into it. We don’t make it about us. We can completely separate our own things.

I mean, there have been days, weeks, months that I have something going on in my life and it literally is left at the door. And I am so focused on that one individual in front of me, and that person stays in that room. I go to a whole nother room with totally other things they’re sharing with me, and they don’t overlap, interchange. They do not get projected onto one another. And I think that’s maybe an explanation of what you’re saying, is that we feel it, but we can keep a healthy boundary all around.

Yeah, totally.

Course for generators and manifesting generators. And actually I have it available if anybody, you know, you can email me and I can send you a link to just this emotion center course, but it’s like a 2-hour workshop. But like, so Steve, Steve is a mermaid. We, one of the women in there was like, you know, the difference between someone who has their emotion center defined. And just think of emotions, waves of watery, you know.

And she said, yeah, I feel I’m more like a mermaid. I need to dive into the emotions and be in the emotions, right? Whereas those of us who have it white, like yourself and myself, we are more like surfers. We can, there’s the water, we might fall into the drink, you know, but then we can pop back up onto our surfboard and look down and go, oh, okay, that’s what’s going on here. Oh, in that room, you just, a perfect example, you know, just, oh, in this room, this person is really, and we can be with it and witness it and hold space and contain it, but walk into the next room and be like, yep, I got it.

This is what we’re doing now. Now it’s interesting though, at the end of the day, Mara, I’m curious what your hit is on this. There are times where if I, cause I’ll have a full day of very emotional clients. And then at the end of the day, I’m just like, oh my God, I am tired. You know, like, uh, I’m not just tired.

I have to be alone. I have literally be, I am not somebody who wants to go out and listen to music. I don’t want to go out and sit at a cafe with friends. I literally want to go home and be alone. And I remember, um, you had guided me with this, gosh, a decade ago when I was working at the hospital in Bend, and it was my hardest day of the week because it’s the cancer center and you’re working with people who are battling cancer and surviving cancer.

And I would come home to my family and I would go just straight upstairs and draw a bath. And they were like, what did we do? Why is she upset with us? I was like, oh, my loves, no, I’m not upset. I literally need to just go, like, do this for a minute and then emerge.

And I just need like 30 to 60 minutes. I don’t need a lot of time. I just need some very deep, quiet, soulful time. Like, there isn’t music on. I mean, nothing.

No audio stimulation, video stimulation, water, heat, Epsom salts, grounding crystals in the tub. And then I could come out. And I remember you said- this was such a beautiful tool you’ve given me that I have passed forward so many times- is to have a password. That’s your- and it’s like, that gives people a knowing of where you’re at. Like, for me, my profile is a hermit.

Yeah, right there. Yeah. I’m doing really well being on my own. I revel in it. I need it for my energy reserves.

And other people think that’s lonely and it’s not. It’s my literally chi filling itself back up so I can go be there for others and be engaged and pour out love to them. But hermit is what I need to do. And your tool you gave me was the safe word. So I’d come home from those hospital days and I look at my beautiful family and my safety word was pineapple.

And I’d say pineapple and they’d go pineapple. And it, we’d all laugh, but I would still go upstairs and take my bath and have my quiet and then come down. But I love that tool you gave me that this is what you learn out of doing the human design chart. You learn that you’re a hermit, that it’s not to apologize or feel bad for you. That we need quiet.

A lot of people think, gosh, is there something wrong with me that I need so much quiet time, that I need so much personal time? I see all these people going out. I have one of my best girlfriends. She is the total opposite energy as I am. She’s got to be a quadruple generator.

Yeah. She literally goes out on Monday night to a live music venue. She’s not drinking alcohol. She’s drinking seltzer water, but she gets just dressed up, she goes dancing on a Monday night. I’m like, I can’t do that.

No. Right. So, because I’m a hermit and I’m splenic and I made very definitive decisions all day. And then I’m like, now go do it. And I don’t understand.

And it’s exhausting to me when people, like, if Steve is emotional about something and I’m like, I already told you what happened, move on with it. Right. That’s- see, right? That right there is a piece to understand because I’m riding the wave as a surfer and he’s going up and down. And in business, this is helping us not throw in the towel with each other and go, you know what?

I’m out. I’m done. I don’t want to equally, you know, it’s, um, it’s just that deep. Experience the future of wellness with Axiom H2 by First Alternative Therapies. Now available at Prana Maya Island Resort in Belize.

This advanced hydrogen therapy delivers molecular hydrogen directly to your cells, helping reduce oxidative stress and inflammation while boosting energy and mental clarity. Used by athletes, health enthusiasts, and those seeking full-body rejuvenation, Axiom H2 restores balance from the inside out. Visit firstalternativetherapies.com. To get one for yourself. Or take a trip to the revitalizing Prana Maya Island and Resort in Belize and experience the transformative power of hydrogen therapy firsthand.

So it’s like if you have someone who works in HR and you have someone who works in accounting and they’re really, they’re drowning, for lack of a better word, to use this surfer and mermaid model. And you went and you’re like, you don’t need to fire these 2 people. Yeah, let’s do their Human Design charts. And oh my gosh, the person in HR can go to accounting and the person in accounting can get it. And now the company is thriving and they didn’t go through the financial exhaustion of a new hiring and training process.

They restructured to help people thrive based on their Human Design chart. Yeah. And yes, yeah, I think that’s, I think that’s a tool that I, I want people to know about you that separate, like I said, from it being My personal life, my business life, but this can be a whole corporation, an entire entity that they did. An entire family can do this. Oh yes.

You know, and I referred a lovely woman to you with her whole family from Palm Beach, California. And she was like, her whole thing was, I am not going to have a kid that’s failure to launch. Uh-uh. We’re getting right to the root of who are they? How do I engender my child to be the most thriving, happy, successful, healthy individual?

How do I launch them? Right. And I thought that was so beautiful of a mom to have gotten this tool to help engender her child and for her as a mom to not be frustrated going, my child, right? Like, why are they doing this and why are they not doing that? And how are my 2 kids- we’re the same parents.

How can we be so different? Because every single person in that family has a different chart, and we’re going to activate each other differently. We all sit around the dinner table and have a conversation, and everybody is going to interpret it differently based on their chart and based on these different ways that they are hearing and perceiving and taking in that energy. And yeah, it’s pretty wild. I thought of you also that I’m reading a book called Unapologetic Hospitality.

This has gotten popular reign right now. He’s a famous restaurateur out of New York City, and he recently was giving an example of restructuring with his- in his own restaurant staff, that it was a busboy or a deliver- a food delivery, right, who was just not thriving. Turned out he was actually a natural-born leader, and they made him an expediter. He went from being a food delivery guy to an expediter, which is maybe one of the most important jobs in a restaurant. Yeah.

He’s the projector, the project manager, right? And he was like, all of a sudden I realized where this individual needed to be within my restaurant. And I literally went, this is Human Design. This is Kris. This is what she does.

You know, it’s cool because I don’t know if in that book he even mentions that or if he did something like that. But this is what I mean by our design does us, not the other way around. So even in situations, we do tend to kind of learn, well, this works with this kid or this works with this employee and not with this one. The key is when we start to pay attention and really follow energy and we are aware of our own energy, we’re aware of our own filters and the way that we operate just enough. There’s no such thing as perfection, but if we know ourselves well enough and we can read other people’s energy pretty good, we start to see this is what works, this is what doesn’t.

Human Design just locks it in, not locks it in, it just shows you the evidence. Well, oh, this is why. I have so many clients who most of them started out as women back in the day, like a lot of female entrepreneurs or just women who would come. Women, we tend to be the ones seeking out the support, but they would bring in their partners or their husbands. And it was accountants and lawyers and ex-cops and firemen and, you know, electrical and, you know, electricians and like construction workers.

I mean, these are guys like, they’re not necessarily like, ooh, I want to learn more about my design. You know, they’re just like, my wife brought me, you know, like, this is bullshit. I’m like, hey, you don’t have to believe anything I tell you. I, you don’t, if does, if this doesn’t make sense to you, you know, I’ll give your money back. And they’re like, okay, fine.

I’ll sit here. And then. I show them and I’m like, here’s the mechanics. Here’s, and they get that. They’re like, oh, the left brain.

That’s what’s so cool about this, right? The left brain can look at this and go, oh, here’s a map. This is why this is doing this. And then I can say, and hey, look, your partner’s is different and this is why she’s, oh, okay. And invariably they were the ones who wanted to come back.

They’re like, hey, can we go see? They call me back. They’re like, I want to come back in. I want to find out what’s going on here. And yeah, it’s really cool.

So I think that that’s what I love about the system is it’s very visual. So we’ve got this right brain that can take in the visual of it. And then you’ve got the left brain that can say, ah, it’s mechanics. There are rules here. There are things that are happening and they make sense.

And I think that’s something that is really beautiful. And the other thing I will say about this that I think is very powerful is that most personality tests and/or systems out there, the Enneagram or Myers-Briggs or the DISC or all of those things are on a bell curve, right? And so it’s like the N of this many people. Here, the N is 1, meaning it’s just you. It’s your birth date, time, and location.

And so there’s only one person like you. And even if somebody was born at the same exact moment in the same hospital, they have a whole different genetic makeup from their parents. They had a whole different experience of the body being built up and the way the transits and the locations that they were at and their own parents’ influence. Even twins, they have a different soul, right? So they’re like 2 souls.

They’re gonna come in, they’re gonna express in, even if the design is very similar, they are going to express really differently. And, you know, we can’t get down to- the avatar is the same, but the, the alma, the soul is, is different. Yeah, I love that. One of the things that I like to do, so I mean, there’s lots of different embodiment tools. Um, what I love to use is something, so I’m an artist and I love to bring in a little bit more like art therapy.

And, um, so I use metacognitive drawing a lot in with my clients. Sometimes I have a client right now who is, um, she is emotionally defined. So remember we were looking at the solar plexus, Steve’s like, he’s like that. He’s a, she’s a mermaid too, right? So she’s designed to feel things deeply.

But when she was growing up, she was not allowed to feel things. She was punished. She had a very abusive father and who wouldn’t, and it was always about you know, stop, you know, you can’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t do this.

You know, like it was just shut down all the time. And her mom was also walking on eggshells and was not allowed to, you know, feel anything either or show any emotion. Right. So it was very much about, you know, oh, you’re so stupid. You can’t do this.

You can’t do that. And so she developed this intelligence, her intelligence. She’s so, so, I mean, she’s naturally smart, but like her intelligence got overdeveloped. And all everything that’s happening in her body and her emotions and her solar plexus is like, no, I can’t, I can’t go there. It’s not safe to go there.

So what we’ve been working on and using the tool of metacognitive drawing is I’m like, I don’t want you to think about what you’re feeling. I want you to just let your pen move and just tap into whatever the experience was with your partner or whatever the situation. And I just want you to breathe and let your pen move. And that’s how she was able to come into and experience that. And so we’ve been working on helping her to rebuild and trust that she does feel things deeply.

She is fully capable of doing that. And we’re giving permission back to her body, her mind, her spirit, everything to be in her body. So does metacognitive art then tapping into what would could we say the subconscious, that you’re having her just draw without design in mind, anything? Is that then the subconscious coming out? Yeah, it kind of is.

So what we’re doing- so sometimes the way I’ll do it is if I’m feeling really anxious, and anybody could do this, you could just- you- all you need is a piece of paper and, uh, any kind of writing implement. And if you’re feeling, let’s say, anxious- I remember doing this very clearly, I a couple years ago. I was feeling it and I was just like really bound up. And so I just thought about, I was like watching my body. I was thinking about the anxiety, but I was letting the pen move and show me what my body, the way my body was processing it.

Like the vibrational frequency. Yeah. Coming out. Exactly. And then the key is to just breathe as you’re doing that.

So I was just breathing and I was like, And I was noticing it was really small, but I just kept breathing and staying with the feeling, just kind of somewhat above myself, but also watching what was happening. I’m not trying to make anything happen on the page. I’m observing what’s happening and then breathing. And pretty soon it starts to loosen up and the line loosens. You keep breathing and then it’s like, oh, whoa, wait a minute.

And then there’s more movement and I could take a deeper breath and I could. And so again, I’m not trying to force that. I’m, I’m breathing, watching it, letting the energy move, because that’s essentially what we’re doing. But you’re kind of watching it. That’s why it’s the metacognitive.

So we might be thinking about something and letting the pen move, but we’re not trying to force it. We’re not trying to draw anything. You keep your pen on the page without lifting it up, and it’s about 90 seconds, 2 minutes, and you just keep breathing and breathing until something releases and there is, there’s this release that happens sort of like, huh, okay, that’s what it is. And so what I do with design is, so that was one example of how I might, you know, help her to reconnect with her solar plexus, which is colored in. She is really designed to feel.

But someone, something else, I might pull in different aspects of the design or what does it feel like? Um, I bring in a lot of stuff around attachment or fawning or freeze? And how does that feel? What does your body do when it, when you fawn? Let your body show you because we don’t always know.

It’s the nervous system. So what we’re doing is we’re tapping into the nervous system where we’re giving it a voice through making a mark. And by watching it, there’s something happens and it shifts. It’s really cool. And then using the breath for sure.

You could explain this way better than I can, because I just learned this. I will never forget when I learned it. I learned it in December of last year, and it blew my mind. I couldn’t stop talking about it for the rest of my week with these people, is that our nervous system and brain actually metabolize an emotion within 90 seconds. Yes.

And you just said, and within 90 seconds, I can feel the loosening of whatever I’m drawing, however the implement is moving on the paper. I was like, oh my gosh, that is literally proving the brain and nervous system are metabolizing, processing, releasing that emotion. And I have caught myself my entire life, especially as a healer, is I’m going to make it better for you. I’m going to quickly, as quickly as possible, I’m going to make it better for you so you don’t have to feel this anymore, regardless of what the symptom is. Right.

And we think about it with a child who’s crying and unhappy and you’re like telling, not even meaning to reprimand them about it, but just helping them to say, hey, enough, stop versus let’s just, let’s 90 seconds. Let’s let it out. Let’s just feel it. Let’s, you scream, you cry, you let it go, honey. I’m going to hug you at the end.

Whatever. Yeah. If we did that for every emotion we feel for 90 seconds and then use your incredible tool to actually see it haven’t like- and so in 90 seconds, I know, 90 seconds. But think how fast, right? Like when we were looking at the charts, here’s what’s interesting is that, you know, you said, and I’ve done this as a parent and I’ve done this as their, you know, like someone is upset, especially in the undefined solar plexus that we looked at, right?

So we looked at Steve’s is colored in, right? He’s feeling it now. People who have that colored in can also do this. They can feel, they can empathically be, you know, get activated by someone else too. It just works a little bit differently.

But let’s talk about those of us who have it white. We’re like, oh my God, you’re upset. I can feel that in my body because it’s not just that I feel it, I’m amplifying it. So they’re a little bit, you know, frustrated. In our body, it might feel like rage.

So we’re like, and if we don’t know that it’s it’s theirs. Like if it’s something’s going on, we see this with partners a lot. As a practitioner, we can kind of go, oh, okay. And I want to make that better for you. But how much of that is I’m not okay that you’re not okay?

So, so much of our practice is how can I be okay even if other people aren’t okay? When we build that for ourselves, then we can hold the space even more and we’re not trying to fix it over there so that we feel better. That’s codependency or fawning. And I’m going to schedule my next appointment with you for immediately after this. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I mean, we- here’s the thing, Laura, I love that you just said that because it’s a practice, right? Like, every- we, we forget. And then once we start to go, whoa, I got to build that muscle, I got to build that muscle, I have to be able to tolerate distress a little bit longer so that I can hold that space. Because that’s the pattern you learned. It’s the pattern I learned.

That’s the conditioning. That was how we learned to stay in relationship and connection with other. If I could make it better for them, we, I didn’t lose. They, they kept me around. It’s safety.

That’s attachment. But once we start to get older and we start to go, okay, wait, this isn’t working, but it kind of does work actually. I’ll keep doing it. But it’s not because then it drains us and we’re exhausted and we’re doing other people’s work. And that’s what sovereignty is when we start to come back into our own body and look at our design and go, hey, this is not my to respond to, or this is not my place to initiate.

I’m feeling this energy, but wait, no, this is not my circus, not my monkeys. This is not my thing. You know, like this is not what I want to do. And I’m saying that specifically to you, Nora. Because we talked about that ear design.

We’re going to keep talking about it for the next 15 years because obviously we’ve been hearing it from you for 15 years. We’re going to keep hearing it for another 15 years. I know, but that’s the thing, right? We, once we, if we keep practicing it pretty soon, we don’t need, this is my biggest thing now is that I want to teach people how to use their map, their, their design so they no longer need it. Yeah.

So it’s like, how do I, how am I navigating through the world? Not like I have to pull my map out every 5 minutes and go, oh, it’s this, or I’m this, I’m da da da da. But to this place where we’re familiar enough, you don’t have to know all of it, but if you know a couple of your patterns of where it gets activated, you can deactivate that. Like, that’s the thing. And then you don’t need the map.

It becomes so how you navigate in the world. And it takes time. It takes time to practice that. Yeah. Well, I think that’s probably my favorite takeaway is how can we all navigate the world, right?

In grace and peace and love. And, um, that’s the goal. So Kris, this has been just so amazing. I would love, as a quick summary, what is your maybe top 3 takeaways you want people to know about you as a therapeutic coach and a Human Design consultant? What are your 3 greatest takeaways you want people to really embody, right?

You’re more intuitive than you think you are. Like, we’re all reading energy all the time. And that the, one of the biggest things I see for folks is that depending on, you know, we were just talking about that little bit of codependency or fawning or something like that in the nervous system. We have all been conditioned and there’s nothing wrong with that. It just is the way it is, but we’ve all been conditioned to override our own inner knowing.

And for me, that is one of the biggest things that I work on with people is like, here’s how to trust what you know, whether you’ve been in antagonistic abuse, narcissistic abuse, coercive control, whether you’ve been in a cult, whether you’ve been in a religious cult, whatever it is, whether it’s just your family and you keep overriding that, there is a way back home. And we know, we do know. It’s the biggest block to our knowing is that trusting it. And so helping people to unwind that and come back to their truth and their trust, that’s a big piece of it.

And yeah, God, there’s so many things. There’s about 20 things just popped in. I think the biggest thing is that that I’m excited about moving forward is doing, um, I’m developing a program that’s blending all of this together right now. So it’ll be mostly for generators and projectors just because they tend to be the ones that there’s the majority of the population, but any type could come through it. And it’s really about learning how to read your energy, know what’s yours, what’s not yours, where you’re getting pulled off track.

Um, and then teaching other therapists how to use Human Design in clinical practice. So that’s the next big thing that I’m working on. So I love that. That means you could be training someone near to someone who’s listening to this to be able to have in person and as well online with you. So we will for sure put up all of your contact information, including your TED Talk that you expertly delivered.

And, um, we’ll put all that up. So people can find you. I know for now we’ll say Krisprochaska.com. You have the most beautiful and informative website. And from my heart to yours, ah, I’m so grateful for you.

Oh, thank you. Likewise, dear. Yeah, thank you so much for having me, and this has been such- so much fun. It’s been fun. Thank you.

You’re so brilliant at what you do. I think everyone could benefit from your, your skills. So yeah, you do. Thank you, Kris. I’ll talk to you soon.

Okay, bye-bye.